Friday, June 02, 2006

Ballad For a Sharp Dressed Mind

He's a man of sorrow this friend of mine and these words are for him, though he'll never see.
You wrote me baby one more time, crawled from beneath the burden of your sharp dressed mind
and what am I to say...
The report of your dying was premature
You only took to your bed in grief and desperation
Baby there is no cure for the torment you feel
No matter how many times Madonna comes to you,
She’ll always leave taking the baby Jesus
leaving grace in ashes at your blistered feet
Tired from walking tired of talking and what good are words anyway
I could tell you about the Daylight Robbers but you wouldn’t listen
Listen baby...
You’d better find a reason to live or they will
take your golden soul
I’ve been to where you are
walking the needles all alone
looking for redemption
or just a reason to go on
I can’t be that reason baby
You must find something more
I’m not enough
Still I’ll hold you at midnight when the red fades to black
and the candle of your loneliness leaves you crying
All I can do is gather the tears and mend your heart
We can hope for one more day

Thursday, June 01, 2006

The Return of the Silver Bullet and an Unlikely Swede

Every now and then I get a 'happy note' from the universe. First of all, I'm feeling better since yesterday I got the camaro back! YAAAAAYYYYY! I was a little scared getting behind the wheel for the first time since the accident. I sat in the parking lot of the collision center at the dealership for a long time and then the car kinda said, "It's ok. Really." Then I heard that familiar rumble when I turned the key in the ignition. SWEEEEEET! In my next life, I want to be a formula race car driver. I do love speed! Anyway, I've slowed down quite a lot since the crash. Getting the car was just perfect. The manager at the shop and everyone else grinned so much when I signed over the insurance check, I thought maybe the Pope was in town or someone had won the Lotto. After I got home, I had a note from Friend Stephen, whose very existence on this earth defies my notions that men are sucky sucky sucky swine! I mean he is the exception and if there is one exception then could there be others? This is a question the Barbie does not want to consider because the Barbie is certain that she is right! I have a perverted need to be right. Then along came "The Swede." A while back I read his Blog. I was fascinated by a life so very different than mine; so ordered and perfect and blessed. Mind you this was a long time ago that I wrote words to that effect on this blog. Well, it seems he googled the Blogosphere and found me. Not only found me but wrote to me. Now I find all of that amazing. Nothing and I mean nothing is more important to me than human to human contact and to think we two very different strangers could meet up like that....well it blows my "Barbiebrain" to smithereeeeens! He wanted to know why I said what I said. I wanted to know why he cared. I don't think either of us got what we wanted but the contact, now that made my day.

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

I'm Lookin' For A Real Love Baby

My love life is every bad blues song ever written and every painful cliche you could imagine. I've lived it. I'm here to testify! First let me admit, I am a diehard romantic with a streak of cynicism. I also admit to a fascination with internet dating sites. That last confession makes me a lifelong member of the "Cheesy Club For Pathetic Losers." I resist the urge to surf through the personals until I can't stand it anymore and my curisoty gets the better of me. And then I'm hooked on lookin' for days, wondering, "What if he's out there somewhere....looking for me!" Like a lot of women, I sometimes get the feeling that I'm a magnet for lunatics and morons. Mind you, the L&M's always sound wonderful in their profiles. Even after a few phone calls, you can usually never tell. Then their 'cloaking devices' come down and gradually I begin to realize I've hooked another dud. But I keep trying.

Monday, May 29, 2006

She's Got A Ticket To Ride

"Sed diabolus"
Only the Devil Laughed.....Hildegard von Bingen
I feel like I've got a ticket to ride the crazy train; destination Looneytown. It's a one way ticket and the urge to board that train is so strong.. What makes people so vile, so lacking in mercy? I know the answer but can't help asking the question.